Happy Accidents: On Keeping Yourself Open to Possibilities

So I accidentally wrote a book.

Well, let me back up. I accidentally ended up with a writing partner (who, despite what you may think, did not write my book with me).

No wait, let me back up again. Everything that I have in life is the result of happy accidents. By which I mean that a lot of what I’ve accomplished in life is due to two things: random chance and being open to where things might lead.

When I was but a nascent scribe, a wee teen poking her deeply closeted head into the wider world, I ran a Star Trek fanfiction writing group (my nerdiness was never nascent, it’s been with me since light first stung my eyes). It was in this group I met the woman who would become my best friend in the world, my wife, and yes, my writing partner.

I was just a kid who had a million stories inside screaming to get out, and who thought writing in the Trek universe would be fab. I didn’t go looking for romance, or for lifelong friendships, or anything more than writing stories with people who had a shared interest. I also didn’t go in thinking it would ignite a spark that would lead to an entire writing career.

Years later, when my wife and I were past the cutesy awkward kisses, past the heart-rending agony of a long-distance relationship, past a skimpy tiny wedding in a small and ugly hotel ballroom that was all we could afford, I was still writing. That spark had become a nicely well-tended campfire that kept me warm during the cold, biting wind of mundane day jobs.

My wife, despite having joined said fanfic group to write, never saw herself as a fiction writer. She was a trained journalist, and thought she belonged on the nonfiction side of the line. But she was editing my writing, always the first line of defense there to tell me “This could be worded better,” or “You’re repeating yourself here,” or “This doesn’t make any sense at all, what in the world are you doing?”

But it was more than that. She was a sounding board—generating ideas, plots, and character arcs right along with me. It was so much more than editing. It was co-writing, and I told her so. And she didn’t believe me. But here we are, a team that’s been writing together for years and years now, so I get to tell you all that I won that battle and I was right and I get to do it publicly in this article! This is more than gloating, this is, like, a supergloat.

Did you know I also never thought I’d have the opportunity to do that? But the option presented itself and here I am, seizing the moment. Look how on theme I am!

I love writing with her. We complement each other remarkably well, have the exact same sensibilities and things we like (and dislike) in fiction. We’re constantly pulling apart every television show, movie, book, comic, scripted podcast, and lengthy weird articles about happy accidents, to see how they’re made. We discuss what we loved and why, and where things went wrong (in our opinion). We’re always learning and growing and bouncing ideas off of each other all day and night. Maybe that sounds exhausting to you, but it’s heaven for me.

In a thousand years I could never tell all the stories I have in my head, and I love writing and I love my wife, and so it’s basically the best thing ever. And the spark that became a campfire is now a raging wildfire, but like… a good one. This metaphor has gotten away from me. Where’s your writing partner when you need them?

Once I came out publicly as trans, I began chronicling my transition and the experience of existing as a trans woman in this world via weekly essays. Did you think I would pass up a chance for more writing? Come on, it’s like you don’t even know me. We’re almost 700 words in, we’re like besties by now.

As I was already writing about trans issues, and am not just a writer but a screenwriter, I was very quickly flooded with requests from readers to explain the trans allegories of The Matrix films. The Wachowskis had just confirmed (sort of!) that the movies were intended to explore trans themes, and everyone wanted to know what that meant.

I’d always deeply loved those movies, but hadn’t seen them since realizing I was transgender. I was excited to see them again, and figured there’d be some broad applications to the trans experience within. I’d get a good essay out of it. To my entire surprise, they went so deep into exploring the trans experience that my one essay ended up as twenty-four essays covering the entire franchise. I found that they had so many wonderful, beautiful, important things to say about trans life that it took me some 60,000 words to explain it… to help others see the glowing, sparkly magic I saw lurking just under the surface (though just as often it sprinkles its badass fairy dust right in your face).

And so despite being a girl who only ever wanted to write fiction, and thought she’d be doing so alone, and not sure she’d ever find the perfect collection of conscious atoms to share her life with, and who didn’t even know (or couldn’t consciously admit) she was a girl for far too long… I ended up a woman who wrote a nonfiction book on her own (that was heavily edited by her wife first, natch… old habits die hard). It’s called Begin Transmission: the trans allegories of The Matrix, and it’s out June 27, 2023. If you enjoy the tone of this article you’re gonna love it (if not, look, I’ve got nothing for you).

Order Begin Transmission: the trans allegories of The Matrix by Tilly Bridges today. 

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I didn’t mean to write a book. I didn’t even want to! They’re just so many words, folks. I’m primarily a screenwriter for a reason: laziness (I kid! This is a joke. I am good at jokes.). I didn’t mean to write nonfiction. I didn’t mean to create a fanfic group to find a best friend and the love of my life.

But all of that happened because I kept myself open to the possibilities. If I’m honest, that’s how I finally accepted my transness, too. Sure, I was scared of what I might find if I looked deep inside, but then thought… what if it’s good? Don’t you at least want to know?

What if that person you just met might end up being the love of your life? What if that person you love talking story with could be the writing partner of your dreams? What if your next great story idea is one delightful chance happening away?

Happy accidents are everywhere. All you gotta do is be open to them. And then you, too, can accidentally write a book.*

*This declaration is not guaranteed, no substitutions allowed, void where prohibited.

If you love to write and have a story you want to tell, the only thing that can stand between you and the success you’re seeking isn’t craft, or a good agent, or enough Facebook friends and Twitter followers, but fear. Fear that you aren’t good enough, or fear the market is too crowded, or fear no one wants to hear from you.Fortunately, you can’t write while being in the flow and be afraid simultaneously. The question is whether you will write fearlessly. In this workshop we’ll look at several techniques you can use to keep yourself in the creative flow and out of the trouble and misery fear always causes.

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